Hello to your mind. How is your mind today?

Hello, you.

How is your mind today?

Yes, I know this is an odd way to start a conversation. It’s not small talk. It gets to the heart of the matter, and nudges you in a way I want to nudge you. Your mind is important. How is it today?

I don’t like the standard opening as much: How are you doing?  That put the emphasis on the outside world. It’s important for me to distinguish between the inside world (your mind) and the outside world (people, the affairs of life, your physical surroundings and comfort). The outside world will keep changing. It isn’t under your individual control so much. But the mind is only under your control. In fact, you are the only one who can say how your mind is directly. How it is experienced?

Our mind is our safe harbor. Terrible things can be happening in the outside world. We, ourselves, can be hungry or cold or mistreated. But there are those in the world where the outside world doesn’t invade their mind as much. To quote various writers, they can feel the pain, but not the suffering.

There is another, unfortunate pattern to the mind that we don’t like to admit. Underlying most everyday happiness is suffering. Put more starkly, getting what we want is awesome, but unreliable. That unreliability is the suffering.

For a long time, I mostly got what I wanted, out of relationships, sex, money, etc. And, while the high lasted, it wasn’t too difficult to feel great. If asked how my mind was, I would have said, “My mind is great. I have a great life. Good girlfriend/boyfriend. Good sex. My job is stable. I have lots of friends. Plenty of money… always good to have more but I have enough.”

Rereading that, I now notice I started it out with a lie. My mind wasn’t great. It was getting what it wanted. There’s a big difference. And when some roadblocks popped up, when something didn’t work the way it was “supposed to”, my mind went to very not great. It panicked about what is wrong, or how I could change things. It was also afraid of losing what it had. I would go to the gym to maintain my body in good condition. This is generally a fine thing to do (maintaining our health is helpful). Eventually the body will fade. So let us not neglect that we can develop the following skill: having a mind that could deal with my body not being in a good condition, deteriorating. 

My mind was not like that. I was in denial. My mind is not like that. But now I’m no longer in denial. I’m just starting to get to work.

nothing is enough - poem

There is a dharma talk by Gil Fronsdal that made a big influence on me. A man from Santa Cruz died and left a poem called Nothing Is Enough.

Here is the dharma talk. https://www.audiodharma.org/talks/audio_player/8865.html

Nothing is Enough

Or everything is not enough.

I have a hunger...

The hunger is me.

If I feed it, it wants more.

Mostly, it wants something else.

A wise person, said STOP.

...

Poem by Frank... Last name unknown

Mindfulness contemplation, topics

 These are my notes from the greater discourse on mindfulness. It gives many topics that one can contemplate and remember to investigate.

I went a long time just trying to do concentration practice. Well worth it, but it got stale. Currently, I am looking more at greed, anger, and delusion. Is it there? Is it not? And also the 7 factors for awakening. The earth, air, water, fire investigation is also useful.

Mn 10

Maha mindfulness topics

Gil fronsdal talks on these topics https://www.audiodharma.org/series/1/talk/1742/

 sutta 30 of Wings of Awakening

"Wings to Awakening: An Anthology from the Pali Canon" https://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/authors/thanissaro/wings/index.html which provides context.

Or here just for the sutta itself.

"Satipatthana Sutta: Frames of Reference" https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka/mn/mn.010.than.html

Mindfulness of body

Around the mouth, body. In and of itself. Without greed and distress for the outside world

Also, origination and passing away, in line with causes and consequences

Without regard to likes and dislikes in the outside world

In long, out long. Or in short, out short.

Sensitive to body fabrication

Calming body fabrication

Walking, standing, sitting, lying down

Activities of the body. Fully alert.

Going forward, returning. Be alert. Looking toward or away. Bending and extending. Carrying cloak, robe, bowl. Eat drink, chew, savor. Urinate, defecate. Talking and silent. All alert

Sorting grain. Sorting and analyzing.

Parts of the body.

Earth property. Liquid. Fire. Wind/air.

Contemplate corpses. And my body will do this too.

Mindfulness of feelings

Pleasant, unpleasant, neutral

Same, but in the flesh or not in the flesh

There are feelings… as knowledge and recollection, but not entangling.

Mindfulness of mental fabrications/mind

Passion/ Greed and non greed

Aversion and non aversion

Delusion and non-dillusion

Constricted, scattered, enlarged, not enlarged, surpassed, not surpassed, concentrated, not concentrated, released, not released

Mindfulness of mental qualities

5 hindrances, present or not present. Wheel.

5 clinging aggregates

7 factors for awakening, present and not present

6 sense realms/objects

Four noble truths

Understand and identify suffering

Cause of suffering is to be abandoned

The cessation is to be achieved

The path is to be developed.

Audio: Eight Worldy Winds

 New audio episode. Episode 4

https://anchor.fm/nothingisenoughbuddhism/episodes/Episode-004-Eight-worldy-winds-ennoo3

Pleasure and pain

Gain and loss

Praise and blame

Fame and ill repute

We can't escape these, but we can not get too caught up in them.

The etiquette of pissing (urinating)

 One of the teachers I follow says that the Vinaya (227 rules for buddhist monastics, and commentary) is full of good lessons. It particular, it gives specific examples of heedfulness. 

I finally read through all the rules and most of the commentary compiled by Thanissaro Bhikkhu (Buddhist Monastics Code, free online)

This is a bit of a gem.

73

Not being ill, I will not defecate or urinate while standing: a training to be observed.

Arguing from the Commentary’s allowance under the following rule, it would seem that a bhikkhu who needs to urinate, finds himself in a public restroom, and can no longer hold himself in while waiting for a toilet, would qualify as “ill” here and so would be able to use a urinal without penalty.

My dad recently has told me not to pee standing up, and I have to admit that I haven't been 100% in following it.

I think this rule makes a lot of sense with regards to keeping toilet areas clean. Back in the buddha's time, I would guess this meant squatting by the hole rather than spraying all over the place (and missing). Nowadays, with modern toilets, it's about sitting down. Urinals are not allowed (a modern interpretation of the rule).

I have noticed that the dhamma rules are judged based on the same principle as what was taught to Rahula. Look at the results. If they are good, keep the rule. If they are not good, revise it.

Although one could make a rule that says, "if you have to pee standing up, be careful." But buddhism has a different calculus. What is gained by letting monks pee standing up? Not much. And what is gained by asking monks to not stand up? Not that much either, but it avoids a few complications. Pissing when windy. Accidental spray.

Heedfulness also is at play here. Some sects of buddhism even proscribe the position one should use to sleep. So, having clear rules is helpful training for the mind. More precisely, it wrests control away from the mind that tries to just do what it feels like. It asks the mind to do things in a very very careful way. Watching. Heedful. Alert. Mindful.

There is also the famous Kasambi (sp?) incident. As told by Kevin Griffin, the monks got split fighting about whether a monk followed the proper bathroom etiquette. In that day, it was the custom to have some rinsing water in a vessel by the toilet. Apparently, one of the monks failed to refill it. In the modern day, it would be fighting on if someone forgot to replace the empty toilet paper roll.

It started small but then became a full fledged disagreement. The community took sides. They lobbied the Buddha.

The Buddha, according to that telling and the commentary in the Vinaya (vibhanga), was so fed up, he left the community. The community realized what they were doing... Creating dukkha, stress, and animosity. They resolved it. My memory tells me that the Buddha didn't have to decide one way or another... And this is testament to his teaching ability. Letting them figure it out helped them much more than hectoring.

It is an interesting study in the human behavior around partisanship and division. People who are prone to argue will find something to argue about. Having a mind primed for argument is a cause of arguments.

In my own life, it reminds me to be careful with whom I associate. There are plenty of people who are prone to fights. They would even fight about rules for pissing.

I'm fine with just following the rule as a training and as heedfulness. Sitting down isn't going to get in the way of the dhamma practice. In fact, putting aside my likes and dislikes is good practice.

After all, the (outside) world is insatiable, insufficient, a slave to craving. It does not endure.

https://www.dhammatalks.org/books/ChantingGuide/Section0013.html

ZoomBuddhism: My favorite 4 FREE buddhist links, Nov 2020

 With the COVID-19 pandemic, there has been a giant explosion of online resources for Buddhism. Most retreats have moved online. I've nicknamed this ZoomBuddhism, or the Zoom Buddhist Explosion. I am very happy about it.

Here are the resources that I find to be the best, along with some details:

• AudioDharma - https://audiodharma.org/  (FREE)
   This is my "home base" for where I started Buddhism. There are about 1000+ recordings and quite a few videos (since 2020, especially). Gil Fronsdal connects very well with me, but I have gained from many of the teachers. I also appreciate being able to search odd topics, like itching or sex or lying or boundaries or ???. There is also a basic app.
• Insight Meditation Center - https://www.insightmeditationcenter.org/ (FREE)
  This is the physical center for AudioDharma, located in Redwood City, CA. With COVID-19, there are no in person gatherings, and the teachers are now doing live Zoom sessions, with YouTube Live streaming too usually. The best place to get started is to find a session on the calendar: https://www.insightmeditationcenter.org/calendar/. If you are timid, look at the archives which are mostly un-edited, raw sessions. Often, they offer "guided meditation", which are words that guiding you in how to breath or visualize things. These are often a very good entry point for new people. (UPDATE 2022: They have a voluminous youtube channel)
• DhammaTalks.org - https://www.dhammatalks.org/mp3_index_current.html (FREE)
  My main teacher these days is Ajahn Geoff, formerly known as Thanissaro Bhikkhu. This website has books, articles and audio recordings.  He has grown to be quite famous in the Buddhist and Vipassana world because of his frequent and voluminous work as a translator of early Pali texts.  The link is to audio, his evening talks. These are more traditional dharma talks, touching on a subject or idea. They aren't really about guided meditations.  Thanissaro Bhikkhu is on the stricter side of things. I appreciate that he isn't always "just feel good and be gentle". (UPDATE 2022, they have a youtube channel https://www.youtube.com/@DhammatalksOrg)
• Update 2022:  10 percent happier APP and website: https://www.tenpercent.com/ 
  I like Dan Harris and his relatable approach. He breaks it down very simply.   The caution here is that these techniques there are highly focused only on mental noting and decreasing reactivity. These are excellent things, but there are some elements of meditation that aren't simply noting or reducing reactivity. Notably, it de-emphasizes fabricating anything except relaxation, and the insight is perhaps limited to "letting go". 
• For alcoholics or people with other addictions: I recommend the Recovery Dharma, East Tennessee.  https://www.recoverydharmatn.org/meetings.html
  They do not mind if you are not from the local area. I stumbled on it when I went eclipse chasing in Aug 2017. It was a very sweet environment. Not large. Very earnest.
  Note the time zone is East Coast. Noah Levine has been censured for sexual misconduct, but he's no longer the head of the national organization. Plus, I feel that what he has done is helpful and earnest. His book is useful. Don't judge the book by the author's actions, especially the biggest lapses.

Outside of these free resources, I've found a lot of help from the following.

• Pema Chodron's Getting Unstuck audiobook on Audible. Really good about feeling stuck.
• Jack Kornfield's Buddhism for Beginners audiobook on Audible. About 9 hours, but very colloquial and with a lot of humor. I've re-listened about 10-20 times.
• Tricycle magazine is a great resource. It really spans a lot of Buddhism and it's intersection with more pop culture. If your view of Buddhism is too narrow, Tricycle will surely broaden it. (a few free articles online per month.)
• Try finding some of these on Overdrive or Libby in your local library. (where it might be free).

A few that I look forward to delving into:

• https://dhamma-dipa.com/
  I met Dhammadipa at a Thai Forest monastery for bhikkunnis in Northern California at Aloka Vihara. We had a really good dharma talk about pain. She answered my question about whether to open or close the eyes during meditation (it depends on the goal, a noting meditation or an inward focusing meditation).  I felt a strong depth in her practice while having a dhamma discussion.

On Contradictions and Getting the Most out of It.

A word of warning:  you will find a lot of contradictions in what you hear about Buddhism. Don't let this dissuade you. I like the phrase UUDR: Use what's useful, discard the rest. And, it's a good reminder to think about the lessons to Rahula (alternate sutta link). If you notice something helping you have less anger, greed, or delusion (which I also call wishful thinking or if-only thinking), keep going to that resource/teaching for help. Beware... there are things that are comfortable but not actually helpful. Getting what we want is comfortable, but actually breeds greed, anger, and delusion.  

Almost everything I've heard attributed to Buddhism is helpful at the right time.

Here's a specific example: Acceptance can be helpful or harmful.  If you are struggling with trying to control the world, acceptance can be very powerful. Just realizing and just noticing the present moment, whatever comes up, is very helpful. This is often early on the path (and sometimes later, too). But, Buddhism's overall richness isn't just about acceptance. If you accept your bad habits and impulsivity, you don't go very far to calming the mind. For me, it's a lot about thoughts of sex and relationship partners.... I fantasize a lot about finding love, companionship, and sex. So for me, a big part of my current practice is not accepting lustful thoughts and desires when they pop up.

The notes to Rahula of noticing and developing your watcher is very key. Because I also made the mistake of pushing away my lust and trying to squash it too hard, and that just made that impulse stronger. I actually needed to make friends with it, like befriending a problematic uncle who keeps coming back. And, then, once I really studied why the lust/uncle did what he did, I was able to figure out the Karma/causes of it. I was able to "garden" my mind so I didn't feed the lust impulses so much. The lust impulse still comes up, but I'm not hijacked so much anymore. I find I need to be accepting of the impulse, but not accepting of letting it run havok in my mind. And, that was a very, very, very hard lesson for me.

With all that said, probably the first 3 years, I didn't understand much of this and I just played talks before bed and while cooking. And, over time, a lot of this seeped in. Kinda like the famous saying attributed to Dogen: 

“Associating with a good person is like walking through mist and dew; though you will not become drenched, gradually your robes will become damp.”

With this post, I hope you find lots of fog!

PS. Funnily enough, I was trying to figure out how to kickstart Zoom-based communities in January of 2020 (https://buddhistfriend.blogspot.com/), but I couldn't figure out how to get people to seek it out. Well, COVID-19 changed all that! So now I can focus on figuring out apps and games.

SHORTY: May you have ease...

 I found this more helpful. "May you have ease with difficulty."

Instead of: "May you have ease." --- which is pretty good,but has a danger of creating a desire to avoid dis-ease.

Better: "May you have ease with difficulty." --- this is realistic and not wishful thinking. My goal isn't to have ease all the time by avoiding difficulty (in the outside world). My goal is to find ease even amongst the worst difficulties, aging, illness, death, loss, fear, anger.

See also The Sublime Attitudes, by Thanissaro Bhikkhu, for more discussion on the Theravada view of how to use metta for the goal of calming the mind and heart.

Excerpt: an alternate and safe pleasure

 You find that a sense of ease and wellbeing with the breath can do a lot more for you than any amount of status, material gain, praise, outside pleasures—any of the ways of the world. A sense of ease and well-being that come from within: This is really all you need because it fully nourishes the mind right now.

Excerpt from https://tricycle.org/trikedaily/less-more/ by Thanissaro Bhikkhu AKA Ajahn Geoff