The Castle, The Watcher, and The Guardian

The slogan "Nothing is Enough" may give the impression that this is "anything goes". It is not. Some have said that you just see emotions arising and falling and have equanimity and no-identification with them. One phrase is just watching your emotions like waves on a beach; they roll in and roll out. That's useful in one way, but misleading in another very big way. When something like anger arises, it's very helpful to see it arise and see it fade. Don't feed it if you can, but if you do feed it, try to watch how you feed it. This is step 1. But, over time, you want to develop good strategies to combat anger. Specifically, in what ways are you complicit in the arising of anger? Can you head it off before it develops into trying to fight your sister about how she spoke harshly to you 3 Christmas's ago.

The distinction is about internal laissez-faire (which is unhelpful passivity) and external-laissez faire (which is adulting and acknowledging the world isn't always fair).

The nothing of "nothing is enough" is about things external to the mind. But, internal to the mind, this requires a large amount of vigilance and heedfulness. I have to be careful to stay alert and to cultivate the garden of my thoughts to guard against greed, anger, and wishful thinking (GAWT).

THE CASTLE
The Buddha gives the analogy of making your mind like a castle. Around this castle is a deep and wide moat and tall castle walls. There is only one entrance/exit: the main gate with a giant drawbridge. Unfortunately, it's stuck open, so all sorts of crazy visitors come in and out at all times of the day. These are the random thoughts, desires, plans, anxieties, greeds, aversions, shoulds, shouldn'ts, and wishful thoughts of winning the lottery that float through our everyday brain.

Ask people what to do, and they all say to raise the drawbridge. That's the equivalent of trying to smash all these thoughts and turn off the brain. I don't know about you, but I find it hard to turn off my brain. Also, if you close the gate, nobody can come in and out, and that "cold turkey" style of repression doesn't really calm the brain. The castle is stuck with whoever was in it last.  So the Buddha said to first develop your watcher and your guardian.

The watcher is awareness. Position the watcher, alert and mindful of their duty, and have them catalog everyone who passes into the gate. Here is where we close our eyes and try to quiet our mind. But we're not actually supposed to succeed in quieting. That was mistake I had; that somehow I was weird in that my brain didn't turn off. Instead, it's an important first lesson: we notice how unquiet our mind is. We see, perhaps for the first time, all the swirling emotions. I think half the time I find it interesting and the other half frightening. But I keep watching. Because sticking my head in the sand and ostrich-ing doesn't work (a prime example of wishful thinking.) The watcher over time gets very good, and can tell who is coming in and out, what kind of things are hiding under the cloaks of entrants, etc. The watcher can give you a full report when you ask. That is greed. That is anger. That is calm. That is not greed. That is not calm. That is goodwill. That is needy. That is a sneaky self-sabotage. The watcher sees the comings and goings clearly. And it does so largely not at full thoughts (stories), because those aren't very reliable. For example, maybe you are tense. Is that tension justifiable because of the doctor's appointment tomorrow? Or am I overreacting? There is, unfortunately, no answer from the watcher. And fortunately. Fortunate because the watcher's job is just to say, "look, there is tension." "Look, it's related to the doctor's appointment." And, "Look, there is a thought that terrible things might happen that's adding tension." But whether it is reasonable or not is not the purpose of the watcher.

The other role is that of the guard/guardian. This soldier takes an active role, deciding how to manage the gate. The whole game is who to let in and who not to let in. There is a catch. Your guardian is super inexperienced, having binged Netflix for 15 years; he's very out of shape. So, for a long time, your guardian will have minimal effectiveness.

When we see the panic in our minds about that lump being cancer, what thoughts do we find helpful. Panic is sometimes not a choice, and so the guardian can't stop it. But, the guardian might be able to slow things down. To let in Panic, but not the Panic's friends of Catastrophizing and ShortnessOfBreath. In my own practice, I've found tremendous help from letting myself feel emotions (they have momentum: once started, they can't be stopped) but retaining my awareness of my breath. So, when it's shallow in Panic, I take a deep breath, maybe counting. And that is me asserting some control over it, saying, "I'm not letting you, Panic, run the whole of my mind." That's the guardian.

I think it was Woody Allen who said, "My life is full of terrible tragedies, most of which never actually happened." In other words, our minds can be our worst enemies.

But, our mind, when trained, can also be a great ally. That's the role of the guardian, aided by a watcher.  In the beginning, though, it's weak. The guardian can only confront simpler things. Your soldier also has two key traits: strength and smarts. As is often the case in real battle too, smarts can win over strength. So, the soldier will also have to develop smarts, so as to use ingenuity to keep dangerous enemies (like ravenous greed and raging anger) out. The soldier might have to recruit other castle-dwellers to help. Or, the soldier will have to train and put out field agents to try to convince the dangerous enemies to not visit the castle. For me, Lust is a dangerous visitor, so my soldier might try to not put lots of triggers in my brain that spark lust. (I.e., I don't read Maxim magazine). Other dangerous visitors love chaos, so for them, keeping the castle clean and tidy (routine, get enough sleep) will help keep them from even trying to get in. We each have our own demons and dangerous visitors, so we have to be clever and individualized in how we deal with them. What works for me won't work for you. But, you might get some ideas. And, in every case, there are causes and reasons why they visit--so it always boils down to understanding the causes and dealing with the causes. This cannot be stressed enough. Causes! Through some combination of ingenuity and strength, the castle becomes a better and better place. Your mind calms. And nothing becomes enough.

So, my path is laissez-faire for things external-to-the-mind. This includes external-to-body (like my car and US politics) things, but also internal-to-the-body things like my health, nice smells, stinky smells, etc.  Instead, it requires vigilance for mind itself, with a keen watcher (who needs to be developed) and strong and smart guardian (who also needs to be developed).

I also love the play on words of the phrase, "Nothing Is Enough". This is the motto of Type-A personalities who are driven to achieve more and more. In that way, nothing is enough because there always needs to be more. In this Buddhist twist, nothing is enough because more is never needed. Things (in the world, and in my body) as they are... that is enough to follow the call of Dhammapada 183: To avoid all evil, to cultivate good, and to cleanse one's mind.

The watcher and the guardian are the things you want to develop. Don't try to eliminate things like hatred and greed directly. Specifically, don't try to use reason to dissuade yourself. Your reasons may help, but it's the logical realm. In the realm of emotions and tricky ingrained-habits, your logic can't work. It's in the amygdala, if you like neuroscience. So, use your cortex to build that awareness and skillfulness first.

May you develop your watcher. May your guardian strengthen.

Use what's useful, discard the rest. UUDR